That Thing I Do All the Time

Of Bum Knees and Christmas Tree Skirts

So I guess I need to let y’all know what’s been going on. I was in denial for about 24 hours. And actually, while we’re on the subject, you should know that I love denial. You can convince yourself of anything, you know, including that everything is juuuuust peachy.

But reality has sunk in, and I have come to terms, more or less, with the fact that life in the Powell household is going to be very different for a while.

The last couple of weeks have been…yeah.

In order:

1. My child had an ear infection so bad that she had to go to the doctor twice and the E.R. once. This went on for 10 straight days. Those of you who are parents are cringing right now, imagining what her mood was like.

As The Guy’s boss said, “It’s been 15 years since I had a baby with an ear infection. Can’t say I miss ‘em.”

2. On Oct. 15, I ordered a red and white chevron-striped Christmas tree skirt with “Powell” embroidered on it in green from one of those deal-of-the-day sites called Very Jane. After much back-and-forth, the seller assures me that it shipped last Tuesday. It never arrives.

After several more terse emails, she finally tells me that, in essence, she fibbed when she told me the skirt shipped Tuesday, because it turns out that she didn’t even have it yet. Either that, or she was planning to make, monogram and ship my Christmas tree skirt in one day.

(My mom is a professional seamstress who has been sewing for most of her life. Even she is unable to make, monogram and ship a Christmas tree skirt in one day.)

Rather than in any way making this situation right, she simply tells Very Jane to refund my money. So now it’s 13 days until Christmas and I have no tree skirt despite ordering one two months ago, and as you will soon see, I can’t exactly go shopping for one, either. Oh, and Very Jane DID give me a refund, but they steadfastly refuse to acknowledge my horrible customer-service experience.

Merry Christmas to me.

3. I went to the doctor, where I learned I will have to have surgery on my left knee. This is inconvenient but not necessarily unexpected. As Dr. Brandi put it, “Knees usually finally say ‘enough’ after so many years of dance.”

What was most disappointing is that I had finally made the decision to start taking ballet again. Feel free to laugh all you want, but I don’t think I can express how much I was looking forward to it. I mean, I know good and well that I could practice seven days a week for the rest of my life and never again reach the level I was at when I quit, but 1) it’s some of the best exercise there is and 2) it’s an activity that I truly love like no other.

But that’s life, and that’s dance. There are lots of disappointments.

4. I go on a photo shoot, where I dislocate the OTHER knee.

Excuse my profanity here, but no, I am not, in fact, shitting you.

I didn’t fall, and I wasn’t hanging sideways out of a tree or doing anything equally risky. I simply knelt to take a shot (just like any of you who are clients have seen me do a hundred times), and when I got up, bingo. The pain took my breath away, and I couldn’t talk for a little bit.

Here’s the craziest part: After it happened, I just kept on shooting. Not because I’m some kind of badass or anything, but because a) I was completely and utterly humiliated and 2) I am apparently a pathological people-pleaser. The way I saw it (at the moment, at least) was that my clients had driven all the way to Benton from Mooringsport and I was not about to send them home with four pictures simply because my knee couldn’t behave itself.

Thank God it popped back in on its own, or otherwise this story probably would’ve ended with them calling an ambulance for me.

On the bright side, their pictures turned out really pretty.

5. Because of Knee Dislocation IV (yes, four; that’s exactly four more dislocations than anyone should experience in a single lifetime), I had to cancel a three-hour birthday party shoot for this coming weekend. Thank God, my friend Henrietta agreed at the last minute to take the job in my place. Also thank God that the kid’s parents are doctors, so they understand the situation and were super nice about it and grateful that I found a replacement for them.

Who do these things happen to, I ask you? Who?

6. Then, after rearranging my and The Guy’s entire lives because I can’t pick up the baby off of the floor and/or carry her anywhere, I go to the eye doctor to have my pre-op LASIK exam and learn that I am at risk for a complication and have to have an additional scan before I can have the surgery.

Good: This scanner represents the very latest in ophthalmologic technology!

Bad: However, it has not yet arrived in Shreveport.

Worse: Because it was ordered from overseas and is currently stuck in customs.

Because of the Christmas holidays, they’re not doing surgery as often, so my procedure has been postponed until January 25. This after wearing my glasses and having a perpetual headache for two weeks. I am not ashamed to tell you that I started crying right there in the doctor’s office.

So instead of getting 20/20 vision for Christmas, it looks like I’m actually getting surgical scars and at least two knee braces.

Santa, I’m gonna be honest right now: I’m considering baking Ex-Lax into your cookies, you fat m0#$3^f@(43^.

Because I am trying to maintain some semblance of positivity, we will not discuss the likelihood that, for my and The Guy’s Great-Gatsby-themed New Year’s party, an event I have looked forward to literally for YEARS, I will be sitting in a chair almost the entire time.

—-

While I would like to tell you that I have maintained an unfailingly sunny attitude throughout all this strife, that would be a bald-faced lie. There has been much wailing, gnashing of teeth, rending of garments and florid, Texas-style profanity. It is exceedingly difficult – nay, impossible! – for me to sit and watch a movie without doing anything else, so you can imagine how I feel about being confined to the sofa for two and a half days. And not being able to take care of the house, laundry and baby the way *I* like to do it is about to cause my OCD to eat me alive from the inside out.

The Guy cautions me all the time to stay out of the business of trying to decipher God’s plans, but in this situation, if I had to guess, I’d say that this is his sure-fire way of getting me to slow down. I never take off work even when I intend to. Technically, I’m taking December off, but I turned in an article yesterday and had scheduled no less than four photo shoots. I haven’t slowed down in a long, long time, and I know in my heart that I need to. I’ve been working as hard as I can this year to be the best mom I can possibly be and to grow the photography business, and I’m getting really tired – like, tired way deep down where I can’t even see. There’s just so much I want to do and make and plan and help with! But it’s time to take a break. Obviously, my knees think so, too.

So if you need me over the next few weeks, for once, you’ll know exactly where to find me – on the sofa. While that may sound heavenly to some, I know it’s going to take some adjustment for me to be OK with it, but I also know those are adjustments I need to make. And I’d love some company, so if you feel like visiting, stop by and sit a while. (Bonus points if you bring Thai food like my sweet friend Angela did today.)

Apparently, I’m not going anywhere for a while!

Your laid-up
Kel

Birthday Girl

Today, my newborn baby Rat is one year old. To be precise, she will be exactly one year old today at 5:56 p.m. That’s the first time I heard her sweet little mewing cry, a sound I wish I had recorded because it’s growing increasingly difficult to remember what this busy little girl looked and sounded like as a tiny, helpless baby.

Eighteen Hours.

She is already everything I always hoped I would be. And no, I don’t mean that in a weird, vicarious sort of way, like I just gave away my nefarious plan to mold her into a NYCB dancer in my basement lair, but she’s fiercer, braver and mightier than her mama ever thought about being.

Bonnet.

My daughter has changed my life for the better in more ways than I could list in a book, let alone on this blog. Being her father’s wife and her mother are the two greatest things I’ve ever done and ever will do, and if anyone thinks that’s hopelessly un-feminist or that I’ve lost my sense of self or, frankly, my mind, well, I can live with that. I am an integral part of a family. I am important and necessary in ways I never thought I would be. I finally have some sense of my own worth in the eyes of God, and that is what Harper Nell Powell gave to me on her birthday.

Trust the Gorton's Fisherman.

Lest you think I’ve completely gone down the rabbit-hole, I’ll tell you that I still adore my job(s), and I expect I always will. (I told Blake the other day that I don’t ever plan to “retire.” Sure, I’d like to work less and with less pressure, but giving up writing and photography would be the exact opposite of a happy retirement.) I love that I get the opportunity every day to be creative (and get paid for it!), and I love interacting with other adults in a professional setting. I even love the minutiae of running a business. It’s just that I love being a wife and mom more. And if there’s just one thing I want Harper to know always, it’s that I love her and I love being her mom. As I sit here, I know that my own mother loves me more than anything in the world, but I don’t think she was particularly fired up about being a mom in general. I, on the other hand, relish it. I love washing Harper’s little clothes, I love picking up her toys, I love thinking of what to feed her for meals, I love reading books about child development, I love socializing with other moms, I love taking her to church even though it’s exhausting, I love sewing and crafting things for her, I love changing her diaper in the back of my car and I love planning her birthday party (which has been the main reason for my recent unplanned blog hiatus).

Bath time.

That sounds like a lot of distractions from work, and it is, but being Harper’s mom has given me and my photography business a clarity and a focus that I never knew I could have and that, to be bluntly honest, very few who know me personally, including me, thought I was capable of. What used to take my all day can now be done in a couple of hours, i.e., during naptime. And although I try never to speak for The Guy, I think he would wholeheartedly agree that, although he has always loved his job, he has a whole new level of enthusiasm and confidence about it, in part because of his role as a father. If you were to distill it down to a single reason, I guess it’s that there are far fewer hours in a day that we can spend focused solely on our work, so we have to come to our jobs with a laser-like focus and take care of what’s important and eliminate what’s not, which has made both of us more efficient, more creative and more motivated.

This first year has not been easy. Joyful, yes. Easy? Not on your life. There has been an enormous learning curve for me and The Guy to overcome, and I’ve said more than once that, when we have another baby, I’ll feel kind of bad for Harper, because she’s the one who had to be the guinea pig. Every baby is different, so there’s no guarantee the next one will be smooth sailing, but having the first one is like riding a roller coaster in the dark; you never know what’s coming next. At least the next time around, we’ll have SOME idea what to expect. But Harper’s the one who made us parents, and because of that, she’ll always be special.

I’m so excited to see how she’ll grow and change and learn and develop in the next year. Yesterday, at Thanksgiving dinner with family, she more than held her own with her two- and four-year-old boy-cousins, so if I had to guess, I’d say we’re probably going to have more snails and puppydog tails than sugar and spice in our lives. And that’s just fine with me. It’d be great if she were a Girlus maximus like her mama, but if she’s not, then my five-year plan involves turning Harper Nell Powell into a spider-killing, attic-exploring, four-wheeler-riding machine. Which I am most definitely not. Although I did kill a spider yesterday to keep it from getting in her room. (If it had been anywhere else, I totally would have screamed, slammed the door, run away and waited for The Guy to get home. So yeah, I can unload a 9 mil into a splatter target with a pearly-white smile on my face, but smooshing a spider gives me the shivers for 45 minutes. Sue me.) So on top of everything else, Harper makes me brave.

She’s asleep at the moment, no doubt passed out face-down in her crib, drooling on her Winnie the Pooh doll that’s becoming more of a constant companion by the day, but when she wakes up, we’ll look at her Global Babies book that Linda and Elaine gave her (it’s the first thing besides Pooh that she wants every morning – I think she’s checking on them), cuddle her “Tiger Tail” (a little purple-and-yellow plush football with a striped tail attached), scatter blocks and maybe even rip up a fresh magazine (there’s very little Harper likes more than a brand-new, pristine magazine). She’ll babble to herself and say “Uh oh,” “BOOM!” “bo,” “I love you” (sort of), and, if I’m lucky, “good girl.” And that she is, my friends – a good girl. So I better go and fix another cup of coffee. It’s going to be a busy day.

Harper Thanksgiving 2012

Your candle-lighting
Kel

P.S. Want to see the many ways this nugget has grown and changed over her first year? Go here!

Menu Monday: The Guy Edition

The Guy and I were a leeeeetle busy this weekend.

MJ 2 WM RS

MJ 1 WM RS

Porter 2 WM RS

Molly 1 WM RS

Knox 1 WM RS

ET 1 WM RS

Rat 1 WM RS

Jacs 1 WM RS

EA 1 WM RS

EA 2 WM RS

LH 1 WM RS

LH 2 WM RS

There cannot possibly be one single person on Earth who loves her job(s) as much as I do.

But as you can imagine, we were pretty wiped by Sunday evening. Nevertheless, The Guy did me a solid and planned the menu for the week!

To be perfectly honest, I kind of figured it would look like this:

Monday: Wings
Tuesday: Beer
Wednesday: Taco Bell
Thursday: Quail gumbo
Friday: Scotch
Saturday: Steak
Sunday: Mashed potatoes

But I guess week after week of menu planning has rubbed off on him, because he did an excellent job of incorporating what we already have on hand, using up leftovers, taking into account our schedule this week and so on!

Color me tres impressed! So here it is:

Menu Monday: The Guy Edition!

Mon: Soup and sandwiches

Tue: Cajun Alfredo Pasta (I knew what he meant) – a lighter version using low-fat jarred alfredo sauce and whole-wheat pasta

Wed: Haley‘s coming over for dinner and The Guy has rehearsal (he’s in Miracle on 34th Street at Emmett Hook Center Nov. 30-Dec. 9!), so we’re having homemade pizzas!

Thu: Pan-Roasted Chicken With Lemon-Garlic Green Beans

Fri: Black-bean breakfast burritos (our own meatless version of these)

Sat: Sausage, Spinach and Tortellini Soup – one of our all-time favorites! We’ve played around with it a lot, and we prefer to omit the butter and use whole-wheat pasta.

Sun: Chili – The Guy’s own delicious concoction

—-

So here’s my question this week: When you were a kid, did you love Santa Claus, or were you terrified of him?

Your Santa-loving
Kel

Santa Claus is Coming to Town!

post-image

Harper 1 WM RS

Harper 2 WM RS

Santa 1 WM RS

Your merry and bright
Kel

We’re At It Again!

Guess what, y’all!

It’s mini-session time again, and we have not one but TWO opportunities coming up!

(Want to see some photos from mini-sessions past? Here you go!)

Our Halloween Portrait Party will be Friday, Oct. 19 through Sun., Oct 21. These 15-minute sessions will take place at my house and will be available from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m. all three days. Book yours early to make sure you get the spot you want! The cost for the Halloween sessions is $35, payable by cash or check on the day of your shoot. The price includes one (1) CD of 5-10 edited images and a copyright release.

Halloween costumes are highly encouraged but not necessary…these sessions are also your chance to show off those adorable smocked Halloween outfits!

And now for the big announcement: Not only are we having a Christmas Portrait Party Fri., Nov. 2 through Sun., Nov. 4,

SANTA CLAUS IS COMING!!!!

That’s right – you can skip the mall this year!

–You get a full 15 minutes instead of roughly 30 seconds
–You get a disc of ALL your edited images (5-10 pictures) instead of just one crummy photo, so you can make as many prints as you want
–Fewer germs
–No creepy Santas of questionable character
–No lines!
–No waiting!
–Sit comfortably on my sofa, eat cookies and sip cocoa instead of standing on your poor, tired feet in the mall
–And if your child decides he or she hates Santa (played by my sweet father-in-law husband*), we’ll have an alternate setup available that we can use for his or her portraits

*My father-in-law was totally game, but he ended up having to have shoulder surgery.

A preview photo of the Christmas set will be on Facebook mid-October. Sessions will be available all three days from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.

And in addition to pictures with Santa, we can also take family portraits during the Christmas mini-sessions, although depending on the age of your child(ren), you may want to book two sessions instead of just one if you want pictures of the whole clan.

Christmas mini-sessions will be $50 each, payable by cash or check on the day of your shoot.

Also: If you want to pay for your session(s) with a credit card, you can do so in advance via PayPal! Just ask!

I look forward to seeing all my old friends as well as some fresh new faces this fall! These sessions are already going fast, so book early! Don’t hesitate to call (318) 780-4770 or email [kellypowellphoto (at) gmail (dot) com] with any questions!

Now I’m off to pry a glittery pumpkin out of Harper’s hands.

AGAIN.

Your picture-snapping
Kel

Love Bombed

A couple weeks ago, my sorority sister Amy (the same Amy who helped me so much with Dr. Brandi’s bridal portrait shoot) sent me and several other women a Facebook message about one of the sweetest, cleverest, most thoughtful ideas I’ve ever heard of. Her sister-in-law is starting college this fall, and Amy plans to “snail-mail-bomb” her with weekly care packages containing fun and nostalgic items to help her navigate this enormous transition in her life. In them, she wanted to include letters from women she met through her own college experience. As she put it, “I’m writing to my sister friends for help in compiling one of the care packages I plan to give [Hannah]. I know each of you has a great story to tell about college, some wisdom to impart, funny or sad, practical or existential, so please get out your creative hat and share with [her]. Please be as creative or not as feels right for you. You can simply write a ‘top ten’ list of things you wish you knew or had to learn the hard way. You could send a photo with fashion advice or a list of your favorite books that you read in college.”

“No matter where you attended, what your major, who you dated, or how many years it took you to finish I value your stories immensely and think they will serve as a precious gift from sister to sister in how to thrive in college and beyond.”

Well, there’s very little I like to do more than write an old-fashioned letter, especially for a cause as dear as this one. I was in like Flynn.

I finished my letter and sent it off to Amy yesterday, and I thought you guys might like to read what I wrote. Here ’tis.

—-

8 August 2012

Dear [Hannah]:

As you begin your college experience, I wish you all the love, luck and happy times the world has to offer. People always like to call whatever time you’re currently in “the best years of your life,” whether you’re entering high school, starting college or beginning a new life with a spouse, and I suppose, when we look back one day, we might be able to call some period of time or another “the best years.” Regardless, I think it’s safe to say your college years are the time during which you will undergo the most radical transformation. In my own case, I can certainly say they were the most expansive. I learned SO MUCH – in my classes, from hanging out with people from different cultures and ways of life that were completely foreign to me and, most of all, about myself.

For me, college was mostly a happy time, but I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that parts of it were painful. Now that I can look at those times more objectively, I know the painful parts were the result of intense, rapid growth, intellectually, psychologically and spiritually. Clear hindsight does not, of course, make them any less painful, but the pain that comes from that kind of personal development is an exquisite kind of pain that you can look back on and be glad you endured. Best of all, the friends that you make (and keep) while you’re undergoing that metamorphosis are the ones you’ll have all your life.

Amy tells me you’ve decided to go through Panhellenic recruitment. She and I met through our sorority, Delta Gamma, so I’m biased when I say I hope you decide to pledge. DG was one of the best experiences of my life, and aspects of it inform my day-to-day existence. Through it, I learned the impact that voluntarism can have on a community, the value of loyalty and the importance of being accountable to others. While every sorority girl maintains that her group is the best, I know those values are not unique to Delta Gamma. If you choose to join, don’t hold back from your new sisters – throw yourself headlong into the experience, and you will reap the rewards.

Since having a baby eight months ago, I’ve learned precisely how fist-bitingly annoying unsolicited advice can be, so I’ll keep it to the bare minimum. It’s just this: Don’t be afraid to change your mind. About people. About your beliefs. About your major. About your vision of yourself. About your intentions for your life. Keep growing, keep adjusting, keep changing and keep shifting. And remember that no mistake is so big that you can’t somehow make it right.

I’m a writer. (Yes, I do make money at it. Not everybody asks, but everyone wonders.) I never thought I would be a writer. For a long time, I didn’t even know I was good at writing (and some of my critics would argue that I’m still not). I did not major in English or journalism or any other writer-y things in college. I never wrote for a newspaper until four years ago. A writing career was for me an extremely happy accident. I believe in God, and I thank Him every day for letting me have a job that I love so much I would do it for free (and that I did, in fact, do for free every single day until 2008). I also pray to Him that I will never stop feeling like I am getting away with something and that at any moment I will be discovered and thrown out on my ear, so I better have as much fun as possible until that inevitability occurs.

From now on, I will pray that you will one day have a job that makes you feel like that, too.

Because I am a writer, books are sacred to me. Actually, I get a little weird if I go too long without handling a book. That’s probably not the sort of thing one should say in a letter to someone she doesn’t even know, but I work by myself from home, so you can probably imagine that, when finally given the chance to speak, I say inappropriate things a lot.

At any rate, for one of my birthdays in college, a friend gave me the book Tuesdays With Morrie by Mitch Albom. It’s become something of a cliché, but my philosophy is that clichés get to be clichés for good reason. It covers a lot of themes that are very relevant to a person entering the intellectual melting pot of college. If you haven’t read it, you should.

There. That’s my last bit of advice, I promise.

Recently, I downloaded a new wallpaper for my computer desktop, and it’s one I’m going to keep for a while. On a white background, in big, colorful, capital letters, it says, “BE YOURSELF. SERVE PEOPLE. ADD VALUE.”

I think that’s a pretty good motto for college and for life.

Go forward and be mighty!

Kelly Phelan Powell